To elaborate on my last post, I wouldn't want to be the kind of mother who's life revolves around smothering her kids, neither would I want to be the kind of mother who resents her kids for making her quit her job. Hence, find that rich guy, get him to give you a business. That was the key point of the plan...if things go wrong, he'll bail you out, if things go right...wahey! you don't need him anymore...something small init, like a cafe/restaurant/beauty parlour/tution agency/interior decorating...the list could go on...
I'm sure we've all learnt at some stage of our lives, don't ever let yourself be at the mercy of another human being, let alone a man. We've been brought up in a day and age where everyone needs to look out for themselves. No one can afford to be nice, because if you do, then prepared to be taken advantage of. If you take this into account before deciding to be nice, then you're a regular Mother Teresa and I rate you. We see it in uni, we see it at work, we see it everywhere. and to be honest, it's the advice I give people as well. You need to love those around you and be willing to be there for them all the time, but at the same time, you gotta look out for your own interests. The moment you start living your life for someone else, you lose that valuable time that you could've spent making your life better, and in turn making you a happier person, which then reflects on the rest of society. That's why they stress time-management and prioritising. I don't mean be selfish...there's a lot of subtlety involved in the advice I give to people.
My advice for surviving in today's society:
1. Tell people what they want to hear, in a way that still allows you to do what you want.
2. At work, Be liked by everyone, but be noone's friend.
3. Don't be jealous of those who 'suck-up', learn from them and realise that you could get what they get, but by it in a less 'sick' way. Gives you an advantage.
4. Hold tenderly that which you cherish.
5. There's no harm in telling white lies, but only if you are certain it is for the greater good and are aware of the consequences.
6. Have faith in yourself and your abilities, because no one knows you the way you do.
7. But on the flipside, Always be open to criticism.
8. And the point I stress the most, be Adaptable. People may call you fake, may say she's a hypocrite, behaving one way with some people and another with others, but So What...they're just jealous of a skill that is so hard to attain. A skill that allows you to be comfortable in your skin, but not stereotyped into one 'genre' of people. Flexibility gives you that opportunity to learn.
As human beings we are forever learning. Too quickly we like to label ourselves (we always complain that others give us labels, but we're guilty of it too) We need to feel that we belong to something, to feel secure. One of my pet peeves (even though I KNOW I'm guilty of it too) is when people are not open to trying new things, or to trying to appreciate something before they judge it. Example, I Hate brinjals yuck...but i couldn't remember how they tasted yet I still wouldn't have any. So one day someone served me a dish and it was divine, when I later asked what it was, she said...Brinjals! I nearly had a heart attack, but later thought, wow, I was really missing out one something good by being picky and petty.
Again, I'm not saying that we aren't allowed to have our likes and dislikes, what I am saying is that decisions we've made about htings and people when we were younger, do not necessarily still hold now. Every so often, you gotta expose yourself to new and old things again to realised if you're still the same person. We grow and evolve everyday. So do our thoughts, our preferences our goals etc....and the only way we can truly learn how to appreciate life and the people around us is by being open to learning about each and everyone of their different ways. Of Accepting that it's easier to hate than to love something, so why not face up to the challenge and learn to love more...
ok i think i'm yabbling (amrit's new word)...but this is an interesting concept I shall expand on later...